"I'm at the beginning of a road trip that will take me through Colorado Springs next week. Sure would be cool if I could talk you into meeting for a drink or whatever while I'm in town. Let me know if you are interested."
I think I might want to pursue a career at the NSA, because I do believe I have cracked your code here.
Holy crap, what is with the recent spattering of the "let's fuck" approach?
When I set my profile to looking for "new friends" was that some bizarro-dating profile-world code for "gives it away"? Someone tell me, please, cause I'm way too vanilla to know that shit.
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Lose Your Illusion: Part One
"I'm not really looking for a relationship right now, but I'd love to have someone I can spend time with. Maybe we can meet up for a drink? I'd love to meet you!
Let me know if you 're interested and we can talk more later."
An interesting side effect of posting these things is...I no longer blame myself entirely for remaining single for so long. If the most charming thing a guy can think of to try to get me to contact him is a one-night-stand/fuckbuddy disclaimer, he deserves to be rejected. By every woman, everywhere.
Let me know if you 're interested and we can talk more later."
An interesting side effect of posting these things is...I no longer blame myself entirely for remaining single for so long. If the most charming thing a guy can think of to try to get me to contact him is a one-night-stand/fuckbuddy disclaimer, he deserves to be rejected. By every woman, everywhere.
Sunday, July 08, 2012
"Why I didn't respond to your message on (insert dating site here)" #8: Surface Issues Edition
Bachelor #1 - Sorry, but you are one goofy looking dude.
I literally laughed out loud when I first got to your page.
True story.
Bachelor #2 - 15% match and 15 years older than me?
Oh, and for a "medical professional" who makes 100-150k a year, you seem completely unaware that most applications have this thing called "spellchecker".
Your education dollar just doesn't buy what it used to.
Bachelor #3 - You're 23, 24...25?
I said I don't go for dudes older than me.
Apparently, this was an invitation to deflower a generation.
Put your shirt on and go do your homework.
I literally laughed out loud when I first got to your page.
True story.
Bachelor #2 - 15% match and 15 years older than me?
Oh, and for a "medical professional" who makes 100-150k a year, you seem completely unaware that most applications have this thing called "spellchecker".
Your education dollar just doesn't buy what it used to.
Bachelor #3 - You're 23, 24...25?
I said I don't go for dudes older than me.
Apparently, this was an invitation to deflower a generation.
Put your shirt on and go do your homework.
"Why I didn't respond to your message on (insert dating site here)" #7: WTF Edition
So this woman walks up 2 me at the bar and says "I will do anything u want 4 $200" So I give her the money and said " ok go paint my house." I like your profile,I am hurt,mad and whatever i ll get over it.Oh wow that was fast. Get 1 of thise Maine Coon Cats.Only 26% match I geuss I wont be wakin up next to u anytime soon huh? I dont think i m 30 lbs but i use the tread mill to walk the dog,she needs the exersise more than me. So this baby seal walks into a club.
I'm going to let my friend Shanna be today's "guest snarky remarker" for this poetic gem:
"This deserves a dramatic reading on YouTube."
I need to get back to original format - this way does not offer much for me to "write". It's just that people's actual writing shocks and amuses me so much that half the time I'm speechless.
I'm going to let my friend Shanna be today's "guest snarky remarker" for this poetic gem:
"This deserves a dramatic reading on YouTube."
I need to get back to original format - this way does not offer much for me to "write". It's just that people's actual writing shocks and amuses me so much that half the time I'm speechless.
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